Thursday, June 14, 2007

"Making Love Like We Was Just Two Heated Animals"



"I'm the Ali of today. I'm the Marvin Gaye of today. I'm the Bob Marley of today. I'm the Martin Luther King, or all the other greats that have come before us. And a lot of people are starting to realize that now."
-R. Kelly

*blink blink*

Are you f***ing serious???

For years people have debated on whether or not R. Kelly (the guy in the Purple leather outfit to your immediate right) is the all-time King of R&B. He's had a very successful career and has had his share of ups-and-downs, most notably a five-year-and-counting legal bout of child pornography charges.

Has his career been fruitful? Yes. Is he a good song writer? Sometimes. Is he the greatest R&B singer of all-time? ...

I personally have never owned an R. Kelly album and I probably never will. Not because he doesn't have good commercial hits, but simply because he has lost his mind. When was the last time somebody seriously used the word "Midget" in an R&B song or talked about "having sex in the kitchen by the buttered rolls?" Are these the lyrics of a musical genius?

On top of that, The R seems to have only two subject matters that seem to be in direct conflict with one another: sex and Jesus.

Well folks... the lyrics below, from his new album, take the cake. I can never ever take him seriously again after this. In the words of one of my frat brothers, unfortunately, he has worse lyrics on the album. Because of R. Kelly I can no longer eat Skittles, Ape call, or respect astronauts.

-----------------------------------------

R. Kelly the Zoo Lyrics

(Verse 1)
It's like a jungle atmosphere
And we're two monkeys baby
It's like we're on a vine
The way we're swinging it baby
See, you're a tiger girl
The way you're scratching me
I'm a lion
In this jungle I'm a king
Girl, I got you so wet
It's like a rain forest
Like Jurassic Park
Except I'm your sex-a-saurus baby
You and me hopping
Like two kangaroos
Rattling and moaning
Out here in these woods

(b-section 1)
Ooo ooo ooo ooo
Aaa aaa aaa aaa
Those are the sounds I wanna hear
When you're moaning in my ear
Girl you're singing to me
Ooo ooo ooo ooo
Aaa aaa aaa aaa
You got me locked up in your cage of ecstasy
And I don't wanna be free cause it's

(Chorus 1)
Wild like a zoo
And that's the way I like it baby
Crazy me and you
Making love like we was just two heated animals
Baby come and lay with me in my jungle

(Verse 2)
Ooo, I swear I'm about to go
Turn your body around and beat the skins like it's a bongo
A thousand birds up out the tree
Girl, like a swarm of bees
That is how it's gonna be
Climaxing you and me
Touch the root of your soul
Let Mother Nature take control
Over us is rain and leaves
So come on girl
Let's plant these seeds, yeah

(b-section 2)
Ooo ooo ooo ooo
Aaa aaa aaa aaa
Baby, those are the sounds I wanna hear
When you're moaning in my ear
Singing

Ooo ooo ooo ooo
Aaa aaa aaa aaa
(Oh yeah)
You got me locked up in your cage of ecstasy
And I don't wanna be free cause it's

(Chorus 2)
Wild like a zoo
And that's the way I like it baby
Crazy me and you
Making love like we was just two heated animals
Baby won't you come and lay in my jungle

(Bridge)
Ya'll don't understand
Like two cheetahs running free
African butterfly to me
You're my safari fantasy
Girl this is heaven to me
Baby we are like coconut and banana trees
(It's a tropical)
Tropical chemistry
Like the wild life
I'm doing you baby
(I'm doing you baby)
You're doing me baby
(You're doing me baby)
It's you and me
(It's you and me)
Going wild

(Chorus 3)
Wild like a zoo
And that's the way (Oh baby) I like it baby
Crazy me and you
Making love like we was just two heated animals
So baby come and lay with me in my jungle

(I don't wanna break free 'cause this is)
Wild like a zoo
Just the way I like it baby
Crazy me and you
Making love like we was just two heated animals
Girl come and lay with me in my (lay with me) jungle

(Girl I like it cause it's)
Wild like a zoo (Wild like a zoo)
Crazy me and you (Crazy me and you, Yeah)
Heated animals (Heated animals)
Girl come and lay with me in my jungle

(Outro)
And the whole jungle goes
ooo ooo ooo ooo
aaa aaa aaa aaa

ooo ooo ooo ooo
aaa aaa aaa aaa

ooo ooo ooo ooo
aaa aaa aaa aaa

ooo ooo ooo ooo
aaa aaa aaa aaa

Ignorance: not being able to respect Astronauts after listening to an R. Kelly album.

23 comments:

Rell said...

LOL! Those can't really be the lyrics...

This is the same guy, though, that made "ooooooooooo o oo ooo oooo ooooo oooooo ooooooo" words.

K.B. said...

MAN!!! I'm dying laughing at the video you posted. I've never watched that far into "Trapped in the Closet." Did you hear his southern, white female accent?


For real, though - I'm kinda upset about that ape call. Dang... Maybe it was time to put the ape call to rest, anyway.

mark said...

Your boy R has lost it. I guess this is what child molestations trials will do to a brotha.

R. Kelly has sank to a new low.

Gene said...

speaking of Marvin Gaye. Your thoughts?

http://youtube.com/watch?v=Q59NeeAjInc

Gene said...

I can't even bring myself to read this whole post.

What is up with people using Martin Luther King's name randomly like dude was some average joe?! First Beyonce now this Chuck E Cheese loiterer!? TRUTH is that R. Kelly can do for us what Hitler did for the people. And I refuse to be a victim!

JustMeWriting said...

LOL...LOL... @ "When was the last time somebody seriously used the word "Midget" in an R&B song" AMAZING...LOL, because I really don't think I've EVER heard that word in a song...hahahahah!

Serial Blogger said...

Hahahahah....Chuck E Cheese loiterer! Gene that was classic. This sounds like typical R Kelly work.

B you know got this joint on repeat in a playlist. Shame on you!

K.B. said...

I'm up in D.C. this weekend, and I just wanted to leave this quote from M. Wynter about R. Kelly's lyrics - "They're not that bad. I think he'd make a better black president than Hillary Clinton... maybe O'bama."

Ivy said...

Ignorance Personified...

@ Mark - this is what child molestation behavior will do to a person... Dysfunction drives people mad.

dcsavvystar said...

Somebody please put this sicko in jail! omg - where does he draw the line!
swinging from vines like monkeys??

DGood said...

Your comment about the midget was hilarious! It's so sad because I love a lot of his music but then there is that side of him that I can't support, i.e Half On a Baby, Trapped In The Closet Chapters 1-57, Sex Planet, Leave Your Name, I could go on and on. I think what really bothers me is that he is in his mid-40's!

hottnikz said...

Thank you!!! I am so tired of people praising this fool, calling him a musical genius. Was 12 chapters of this nonsense really nessesary? I've been done with him since about '99/'00 after he did Fiesta Remix. After that his lunacy started to show in his music, and I guess now it's showing in his interviews.

Rell said...

LOL! Did anyone watch Chapter 12? I was crying...

Gene said...

Wynter can always be counted on for some nonsense.

Brandon said...

Rell... I'm scared to watch 12. I don't think I could stomach the absurdity. A midget? For real Rell? A midget?

Brandon said...

And yes... Moch is good for out-of-line comments and observations.

Andrew The Asshole said...

Yeah I must say that was the most ignorant statement from anyone in modern history. Charismatic people are believeable because they believe their own lie.

Ticia said...

HHAHA--you guys are a riot....
You know I am from Chicago...don't talk abt Kelly too bad....

But...he is a freak-- I know he has these parties.. Pole parties and he plays his song Wind for Me!?!?! I hear he does that gorilla noise---

Andrew The Asshole said...

ticia seems to know alot about these parties!!!! Sure you heard that from a friend of a friend! Tell me anything

Ticia said...

Andrew...

Well, I don't live too far from the Kelly residence....

I have a lot of friends that partake in the slow wind parties...

He is a big freak.... too bad at the tender age of 26 I am too old for him--

Anonymous said...

look at andrew tha assholes site. might look familiar

Andrew The Asshole said...

yeah it is notice because me and b write on each others blogs thanks for patrinizing both sites!!!

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