Friday, July 11, 2008

Jesse's Getting Lazy


Jesse Jackson is being blasted in the media for comments that he made about Barack Obama before doing an interview for Fox News. While Jesse thought the microphone was off he was caught whispering that he wanted to cut Obama's nuts off for "talking down to black people."

I don't want to get into the political and social implications of the statement (i.e. whether it will help or hurt Obama, whether it will diminish Jackson's legacy, how the Black community will react, etc.)

Rather, I want to talk about the fact that Jesse is getting lazy with the rhymes. The Jesse Jackson of yesterday would have surely come up with a more clever way to say that he wanted to cut off Obama's nuts.

I will, however, give him points on style. Notice in the clip how he slightly bites his lip and makes a quick downward snap with his right arm to express how fast and easily he would de-ball Obama if given the opportunity.

Jesse is a legend. He has always been an eloquent speaker and was a master of coming up with catchy slogans and phrases to emphasize his points. With that, I'd like to offer some suggestions that we may have gotten from the Jesse of old:

"If Obama don't stop running his jaws, I'm going to cut off his balls"
*quick downward arm snap*

"If Obama talks down to Blacks again, I'm going to cut off his lit-tle friends"
*quick downward arm snap*

"If Obama talks to me like I'm a little boy, I'm going to cut off his sacks of joy"
*quick downward arm snap*

*If Obama keeps talking to us funny, I'm going to rip off his botox bunnies"
*quick downward arm snap*

"If Obama talks to us like fools, I'm going to cut off his family jewels"
*quick downward arm snap*


Of course, I'm no pro at this...obviously. These are merely suggestions. If you can do better, then by all means...

I know age diminishes wit and sharpness, but I miss the old Jesse. I miss the "Keep Hope Alive"-Jesse. The Green Eggs and Ham-Jesse...

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

OBH looked down on church-going, gun-owning people from PA. Now he is looking down on Jesse’s constituency. Does this mean that Mr. Himeytown will not be in BHO's cabinet. I was not shocked by the statement, but I was surprised he ended his sentence with the preposition "off". Shouldn't it be “I want to cut off his nuts”?

Carah H. said...

LMRBAO! B, that's what I LOVE about your blog. See, I was expecting you to go in a totally different direction, exploring the implications of such a flub as it relates to the election, and more or less how Rev. Keep Hope Alive just needs to gracefully bow out of the game.

But nah, you really delved deep into the heart of the matter -- and I am grateful for that. Bless you, brotha. And your attempts at replicating Rev. Jackson's cipher-esque pulpit skills were honorable. Cheers to you.

Nas put in his two cents on this issues. I was inspired by his eloquent and inspirational comments as well: http://evilbeetgossip.film.com/
2008/07/10/quotables-139/

Brandon said...

Thanks Carah. I appreciate your appreciation of my attempts to recreate the nostalgia of vintage Jesse.

oh yeah... and Nas is an idiot for saying Jesse is old news and that he and Jeezy were going to carry the torch. He lost what little respect I had left for him.

Jermel said...

This is another classic case of a black leader not understanding the problems that now face our community. They still believe their most important role is protecting us from the MAN. No longer is the MAN our biggest problem. The biggest problems in our community now are internal problems (e.g. HIV rate, education, single parent families, male incarceration rate). Where are the black leaders on these issues? And by the way, I don't consider Obama a black leader. He's a politician. MLK was not a politican, he was a civil rights leader. I think Jesse did hit on something interesting, albeit for the wrong reason. And that is, Obama should be careful about how he addresses black people. The last thing he wants to do in this election is become the "Black" presidential candidate. With that ordination he becomes next in line behind Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton, and we all know where that leads. It's okay to address black people by speaking at events held by organizations like the Black Caucus and the NAACP. However, his comments should be from the point of view of a president not a black community leader. I think he treads on dangerous ground when he starts talking about moral issues in our community. Remember he's a politician, and we all know how moral they are.